Romance is very important to your spouse because romantic gestures help communicate to her that she is important to you. Romance says she is a meaningful part of your life and that you value her.
Typical romance is hard…at least for me. Some guys seem have it come to them naturally. The flowers, the limo, the reservations, and the blah blah blah. Always seemed like those guys were trying really hard just to get laid. “Isn’t he soo romantic” are words that have always made me want to gag a little bit. And also be a bit jealous. In truth, I want to be one of those guys. I mean, I don’t want to be a guy from a Nicholas Sparks book, but I do want to be romantic.
If you remember from the New Year’s Resolutions for Marriage post, one of my resolutions was to be more romantic. I plan to do that by thinking about my wife and thinking of good outing that she would like for us to do together. My better romance ventures have been more about adventures, experiences, and cooperative projects. I look to Facebook to help me find things to do with Carrie. Thank goodness so many places have Facebook pages that list events. It takes a lot of the guess work out of this romance thing.
Sure, you still have to do the typical romantic things. (Flowers, chocolates, promises you don’t intend to keep.) That is part of dating your wife. That is part of making sure that she feels special. My best sweet gestures have come from just knowing my wife. And by knowing, I mean listening to her even when it sometimes includes things that you really could care less about. But that’s just it. This isn’t about you; it is about the person that you love and want to spend your life with. By listening to her, I also know better how to romance her and do romantic acts that will impress her more than roses. If your gifts to her are about as good as those that her aunt or uncle’s that she sees three times a year, then you need to might need to rethink how much you have been listening to your wife. For example, flowers. Carrie loves flowers, but the cats eat them and then puke them up. Carrie would rather not have flowers since she doesn’t want to deal with the puke. Instead, a romantic gesture might be to cook her a nice dinner, clear off the table, and put together some type of flowerless table setting. Setting the table helps create mood, and it shows her that you are thinking about her and are wanting to spend some good sweet time with just her. That helps her feel special, and that is romantic.