“I put a ring on it. I said ‘I do.’ We had a honeymoon. That whole dating thing is over now. Glad that’s all over; now we can get back to life. I mean, we are married.”
I am embarrassed to admit those were my thoughts after getting married. Not sure where I got those ideas from, but they were seriously the wrong thoughts.
I really just didn’t think much about dating my wife. I honestly don’t know if I knew that dating after marriage was a thing. It might seem shocking, but I never saw my parents dating each other. That was not behavior that I knew, so going on dates with my wife just wasn’t in my thought process. The idea of marriage to me was two people living together, but not really doing stuff together that was fun. Dad would watch TV or Mom would have him fixing something around the house. My parents were not ones to kiss each other or hold hands in front of my brother and me. So to me, marriage was very business-like.
Now I realize as an adult that those Friday nights I spent at my grandparent’s house were my parents’ date nights. I just thought my grandparents liked having the grandkids over to spoil; I never realized that my parents needed time to be together, just the two of them. I think since I didn’t see those affectionate moments, I started to believe that marriage didn’t have tenderness.